Communicating with Parents

What no one tells you about being a Child Care Provider

I started my child care business over 10 years ago. Back then there is no way I could have known what was ahead of me. Along the way, there have been many new experiences. Not all great, but certainly opportunities to grow as a child care professional as well as a business owner. So after caring for over 100 children, I have often wondered what I would tell myself if I could go back in time and have someone tell me “What no one tells you about being a child care provider.”

What you should know about being a Child Care Provider

YOU GOTTA BE (OR GET) GREAT AT JUGGLING

If you have ever worked in corporate America, most likely the company had a payroll department, human resources, janitorial staff, cafeteria, etc. Well when you run your own business, you are all of those things and more rolled into one.

You wear many hats as a child care provider. So it helps to be at least pretty good at organizing and time management. I have found it helpful to segregate my weekly tasks into one or two daily tasks to stay on top of them and not get behind.

EXPERIENCE IS HELPFUL, BUT NOT ESSENTIAL

Even though by the time I opened my child care I had raised three children, I was very grateful that I had the opportunity to take a few courses in child development and work at a daycare before I started my business. Getting a background knowledge of the developmental stages of children really helps you not only understand children but also to give you credibility with parents, especially if you are new to caring for children. If you don’t have much professional experience dealing with children, consider taking a course in child development (check out Lynda.com) or even volunteering at a child care to get more hands-on experience.

NOT EVERYONE IS A GOOD FIT

When I opened I was so eager to find my first clients that the concept that someone would not be the right client for me never would have occurred to me. But it is true; not everyone will appreciate your philosophy, location or might even simply be a little overly territorial about how their child is cared for.

For this reason, it is very helpful to brush up on your interpersonal skills. You need to be able to convey your experience, program and most importantly the quality of care you will provide. I often tell parents that they don’t know me, but they can trust my experience.

YOU GOTTA LOVE THE OPPORTUNITY

As a child care provider, you have the opportunity to touch and affect many families lives. Often parents come into the child care environment “green” having no or little experience at parenting. Some haven’t even been around young children until they had their own.

I have become fond of the term “mother’s helper”

Over time you will have amassed intuitive knowledge you can share and use to educate the parents that you serve. It is so important to impart that knowledge in a caring way that parents are receptive to. Not from a “know it all” posture, but rather as a parenting partner instead. Over the years I have become fond of the term “mother’s helper”. More than any other term I like the way it describes my profession.

MY ADVICE FOR HANDLING DIFFICULT TYPES

As I said before, not everyone will be your biggest fan. You may run into parents that feel guilty about not being able to be the primary caregiver for their child. Or even a parent or two that down right resents your influence in their child’s life.

Try identifying with a parents concerns

While it is beneficial to identify those characteristics in a prospective client as early on as possible, it is also a trust-building opportunity for the child care provider. Try identifying with a parent’s concerns. When your philosophy differs, present industry standards (like state regulations or mandates) that support your position.

I remember once I had a parent who was certain that at the age of 2.5 her child was completely out of the nap phase. Apparently, the child was too difficult to get down at night if he had the afternoon nap. After repeated requests to excuse the child from the nap I sent her the following message:

“I want you to know I completely understand how hard it is to get young children to go down at night. Especially with their increased need for independence. And although I would agree that some children do just fine without a daily nap, unfortunately, in daycare settings we are mandated to provide children with a Rest & Relaxation period during the course of our day. What usually happens here is due to our constant morning activities a child will fall asleep. If, however, they do not fall asleep they can get up and resume their day. What I would suggest is that you tell Johnny that if he is not sleepy he does not have to take a nap. But just to relax his body during that time of day. I hope this helps.”

After that note, she completely understood my position. She told her child he could just rest his body at naptime. Of course, most of the time he fell asleep.

CARING FOR CHILDREN FEELS AMAZING

There are times when I am having a rough day, and then I will go to my email and there will be a picture of a child I took care of years ago. It truly is touching to not only see how much the children have grown and to think you were a big part of their early life. But to also see that the parents think enough of you to remember and share their continued growth.

Sometimes the older kids request to come back to the child care and help as “junior” assistants. Those experiences stick with you more than the difficult times and make it all worth it.

Tell me, what has surprised you most about being a child care provider? Leave a comment below.

Further Reading:

12 Things Daycare Providers Wish Parents Knew

How to Build Credibility For Your Childcare Business

build credibility for childcare

Last Updated: 1/12/2018

I think one of the biggest things we struggle with as providers, especially if we are new to the profession, is how to build credibility for your child care business. I mean here we are trying to convince complete strangers that we are capable of taking care of one of the most precious things in their lives; their child. So today, I thought we would see what ways we could build credibility for childcare providers.

How to tell parents about a bad day

Whenever a child leaves my care, either graduating or the family moves, I ask the parents to complete a withdrawal form. At the bottom of the form are three questions where I ask what they liked about our program, what they didn’t like and what we could do to make our program better. I started this practice early on when I started the childcare.

it would be unrealistic for a parent to think that every day was perfect

I remember one year in particular when a parent filled out the form. She asked was this information going to help me or help my business. I assured her absolutely that I was very sincere in asking what could be done better. She said there was only one thing. Every day on the daily notes it was said that her daughter had a great day. She said although she understood why that was said, it wasn’t really unrealistic. She said knowing her child and how she was at home, there were some days that weren’t so great. She said it would be unrealistic for a parent to think that every day was perfect.

I took her observation to heart. She was absolutely right. After all, children are little people. And just like us big people nobody has great days every day. This is actually a point that I express to parents all the time.

As providers, it is common to feel a bit uncomfortable communicating less than positive information about the children we care for. We want to assure the parents that we care for their children so telling them “bad” things makes us feel bad in turn. They are our clients after all. But we have an important responsibility to be the early child care professional here.

I believe in empowering the parent

Ever since that parent’s observation, I’ve made it a point to be truthful when it comes to conveying information about a child on their daily notes. I ask my staff to express good and difficult days on the children’s notes. I believe in empowering the parent and reinforcing their role in parenting their child by equipping them with accurate information about their child’s demeanor is very important.

bring up any developmental stages that might be leading to the behavior

After a long day away from their child, imagine a parent returning to pick up their child. The last thing they want to hear is a bad report. While it may be hard for them to hear, most parents do want to know if everything is OK and when things are not OK with your child. Sometimes that comes in the form of a bad day. I can be tricky and a bit uncomfortable to give parents less than positive news. Whenever we can we note information on the child’s daily note but often try to soften the blow by talking with the parent at pick up time as well. This gives us a chance to ask if there are any issues going on in the child’s life that would cause them to be upset or to be acting out. Are there any recent changes at home or in the family? I can also then bring up any developmental stages that might be leading to the behavior. Young children go through periods where they try to test boundaries. This is their way of seeing what power they have. After all, they are still trying to figure out this right and wrong stuff.

This is also a good opportunity to establish yourself as a resource and a supportive role for the parent as well as giving credibility to your program. For many parents this stage is new to them too. They are not quite sure what to do. It is also helpful if you can offer tips and strategies to help the child and reassure a parent.

We always try to end with something good.

It is also a good practice to try and end on a positive note. Simply by stating something like “everybody has a bad day now and again” or “we’ll have a better day tomorrow”, might put to rest a parents concerns about a possible behavioral problem. We always try to end with something good. Try to find something positive in the child’s day and to give them praise for that as well. Most parents will be more receptive to the not so good news if you are just as willing to give them the good news too.

How do you tell parents if their child had a bad day? How is it usually received?